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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23542657">Wishful Thinking</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/e_of_west_glendia/pseuds/e_of_west_glendia'>e_of_west_glendia</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - Fandom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bisexual Remus Lupin, Coming Out, Gay Sirius Black, Lily and James giving advice, M/M, Sirius and Remus Being Idiots, lots of pining, mini series</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 15:53:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,201</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23542657</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/e_of_west_glendia/pseuds/e_of_west_glendia</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Sirius finds Remus in the library and they get to talking. Sirius really, really wishes Remus would like him back.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, wolfstar - Relationship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>125</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He found Remus in the library— the only other place he’d be at this time of night aside from the Astronomy Tower. He was leaned back against one of the shelves, his back to Sirius. </p><p>Any other person wouldn’t have heard Sirius quietly padding his way across the library floor, but Remus wasn’t any other person, so he looked up. A small smile stretched across his face, the echoes of the recent full moon still etched in deep lines and pale skin on his face. </p><p>“Hey,” Remus said. </p><p>Sirius plopped down beside him, folding his legs and pressing his shoulder into Remus’.</p><p>“Hey.” </p><p>Remus raised an eyebrow at him, curiosity lighting up his face. “What are you doing up?”</p><p>Sirius snorted, that was a funny question. He was awake at night more often than not. Whether it be nightmares or insomnia or just not wanting to sleep in general. </p><p>“Oh, y’know, the usual. Just destroying my healthy sleep schedule and knowing I’ll regret it tomorrow.” </p><p>Remus laughed knowingly. “As if you had a healthy sleep schedule to begin with.” </p><p>Sirius returned Remus’ laugh. “That is very true.” </p><p>Remus smiled again, tilting his head back against the bookshelf and shutting his eyes. Sirius watched him, the steady rise and fall of his breathing, and the way he fidgeted with his hands absentmindedly. He looked tired—he was tired. The aches and pains of being broken apart and put back together again still evident, every moment accompanied with the soft pop of sore joints. Fresh scars twisting up his ankle and disappearing under his sleeves— silver lines that told a story of survival and drew a map of pain. Sirius couldn’t help glaring at the small sliver of moon in the dark sky. Silently cursing it for bringing the boy next to him so much pain. How could something so untouchable and far away do so much damage so close to home? </p><p>“So why are you down here,” Sirius asked, finally. </p><p>Remus shrugged , not missing Sirius’ wince at the firecracker like noise that danced down his spine as he did.</p><p>“Just thinking.” </p><p>“‘Bout what?”</p><p>“Nothing important.”</p><p>Sirius frowned, shifting so that he was facing Remus. “Must be if you’re sitting down here after curfew alone.”</p><p>Remus chuckled lightly, he can’t argue with that logic. He opens his eyes again, Sirius is peering curiously at him, waiting for an answer.</p><p>Sighing, Remus said, “When did you know?” </p><p>“Know what?” </p><p>“That you were into guys.” </p><p>Sirius’ blinks at him, breathing thrown momentarily off kilter and pinched. It wasn’t that the question bothered him, he just...didn’t expect it. Especially not from Remus. </p><p>He cleared his throat, shaking whatever surprise that he’d been hit with off. </p><p>“I dunno, Re. Maybe the first time I kissed a bloke?” </p><p>Remus rolls his eyes at him. “Hilarious.” </p><p>Sirius shrugs. “I don’t know what else you want me to say.” </p><p>Now, Remus shrugs. “Well there had to be some particular moment.” </p><p>There wasn’t any specific time he’d realized it, just small moments— pockets in the folds of time. It had to have been third year when he’d started noticing it. Sunny days at the lake with the Marauders, standing speechless as light bounced off of tawny curls, turning them golden brown. Hours in the library bubbling with laughter and stealing his breath as green eyes crinkled with amusement. Midnight at the top of the astronomy tower, twilight on the roof. Watching as hues of silver and flashes of deep orange and bruising purples, cast a warm glow over the boy next to him. All of those memories filled with dozens upon dozens of thoughts of the same tall, brown-haired and green-eyed boy. Of Remus Lupin. The line between friendship and love blurring into nothing as one year bled into the next. But he wasn’t going to say that— he couldn’t say that. </p><p>Instead he poked through his mind, searching for something else to say and  settling on, “Third year. When I was dating Marlene. I guess that’s when I had my ‘gay-awakening’. We both did, really. Something just wasn’t clicking.” </p><p>Remus hummed in agreement. “I could’ve told you that.” </p><p>“Oh shut up,” Sirius grumbled, aiming a light kick at Remus’ shins. </p><p>Remus snickers and jerks his leg back, grinning at him.</p><p>“Why do you ask?” </p><p>Remus’ grin dropped and he shrugged passively. “Just wondering if your experience was different from mine.” </p><p>Sirius truly counted himself lucky that he wasn’t drinking water or some other liquid. He’d have spat it all over Remus if he was. Remus liked guys? Sirius had to tamp down the rush of excitement that soared through him. Telling himself not to get his hopes up and reminding himself of what happened when he did. Nothing ever went in his favor when he wanted it to. Why should now be any different? </p><p>Sirius must’ve looked more shocked than he thought because Remus laughed again. “I probably should’ve given you more warning, huh? I guess I wasn’t expecting to come out tonight.” </p><p>Sirius swallows thickly, trying— and failing— to discreetly school his features into something calmer, cooler, something more on par with his usual persona. </p><p>“So you’re—?”</p><p>“Bisexual.” Remus finished. “I think.” </p><p>Sirius resisted the urge to let loose a slightly hysterical laugh. God, who cares if Remus wasn’t completely sure! So long as he wasn’t straight that’s all he needed to hear. </p><p>“How did—how did you figure it out? Your realization that you are also in the Queer Club, I mean.” </p><p>Remus laughed a bit at that, shrugging a bit and then instantly wincing afterwards. He really needed to stop shrugging. It was like his go to answer for everything. Especially since he actually did know. </p><p>“There’s this guy…” Remus trialed off as Sirius scooter forward. </p><p>“Do continue,” Sirius said, quirking a slightly suggestive eyebrow at him.</p><p>“Nothing happened,” Remus started. “Nothing probably will happen either. It’s just a silly crush.”</p><p>Sirius didn’t relent. “Tell me about him.” </p><p>Remus took a deep breath, casting a wary glance at his friend before continuing. </p><p>“He’s...amazing. He has this way of making me feel like everything is going to be alright, y’know? And he’s just sweet, and smart, and hell he’s really gorgeous, too. Just everything about him is—I can’t really explain it but—“</p><p>“He makes the whole world seem brighter when he’s around. Makes it seem like all the bad around you won’t ever come,” Sirius said. </p><p>“Exactly,” Remus said nodding. He’d said it perfectly. </p><p>“Yeah, I know the feeling,” Sirius said, swallowing back the pang of jealousy he felt. Definitely not me, then. </p><p>Remus watched Sirius. The way he momentarily tensed, biting his lip, as if he wanted to say something else. A slightly pained look flashing across his grey eyes. Then he relaxed, features melting back into the usual carefree calm of Sirius Black. The change was so quick Remus wondered if he had imagined it. </p><p>“He sounds great, Re.” </p><p>“Yeah,” Remus said, averting his eyes to the ceiling. “He is.”</p><p>“I’m sure he sees you the same way.” </p><p>Remus laughed, wistful and slightly bitter. “No. No I don’t think he does.” </p><p>Sirius ran a hand through his hair, heart clenching slightly at the forlorn look on Remus’ face. “Well then he’s an idiot,” he said quietly. </p><p>“What?” Remus looked back down at him. </p><p>“Nothing. Just coughed.” </p><p>From somewhere deep inside the library the large grandfather clock signified the change in hour. The low rumble of its chimes coursing through them from where they sat. Remus glanced over to one of the smaller clocks pinned up to the wall, sucking in a breath as he caught the time. It’s well past three in the morning, the clock ticking away towards four. Remus stands, extending a hand towards Sirius.</p><p>“We best get going. I’d rather not catch a detention from Flich or that dreadful cat of his.” </p><p>Sirius nods, accepting the hand Remus puts out and letting himself be pulled to his feet. Holding onto Remus’ hand just a fraction of a second too long before pulling away. </p><p>“Yeah, James’ll be pissed if I get ahead of him on detentions. We’re tired right now.” </p><p>Remus rolled his eyes. Only James and Sirius would make a bet to see who could get the most detentions. He starts off towards the door, pausing when he doesn’t feel Sirius’ presence behind him. </p><p>“You coming?” </p><p>Sirius was still standing amongst the shelves, staring at Remus as he paused underneath the window. The light of the moon illuminating every scar and making his eyelids cast long shadows across his face. Merlin, he really was beautiful. </p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>Sirius caught up to Remus, praying to some unseen god that maybe, just maybe Remus would like him back. Sirius sighed, laughing internally at himself, because deep down he knew that that was really just wishful thinking.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>James and Lily attempt to give their friends advice.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“You look like hell.” </p><p>Remus looked up from his book at the source of the voice. Lily was standing over him, arm propped casually against the tree he was leaning on, bag slung over her shoulder. </p><p>Remus snorted in agreement. “I feel like it, too. Move over, Lils. You’re blocking my light.” </p><p>Lily raised an eyebrow, casting a glance at the sun behind her, and then she looked back down to Remus who raised his book a bit. Gesturing at the shadow that now rested over the pages. </p><p>Lily dropped her bag on to the grass beside Remus and then sat down herself, leaning back against it. </p><p>“So what was it this time?” Lily asked. </p><p>“My Mum was sick. Looks like I caught a bit of whatever she had.” Remus said, flipping a page in his book. </p><p>Lily peaked over at him  and a pang of concern shot through her for her friend. She could see the pain Remus was in. His stiff, stilted movements and slow breathing making her wince. He was always like this after he came back from home. Tired and beaten down. Even turning the pages of his book seemed to be uncomfortable. </p><p>She found herself wondering what type of illnesses his mother contracted. Surely they should take her to a hospital if they were that bad?</p><p>Lily propped herself up on her elbows, stealing a sideways look over at the book Remus was reading. She frowned, the page was the same as when she’d first arrived. Remus was staring blankly down at the book, eyes slightly unfocused and mind wandering. </p><p>Lily snapped her fingers under his nose, causing Remus to jump and give her a reproachful look. “You alright, there?” </p><p>“Yeah, I’m fine,” Remus said, still glaring at her. </p><p>Lily’s eyes narrowed. He was most decidedly not fine. Whatever he was thinking about, it wasn’t the book and it seemed to be bothering him.</p><p>She reached over and placed her hand across the pages, poking him in the side with her other hand. </p><p>“No, you’re not fine. You’ve been staring at the same two pages for the past ten minutes. It doesn’t take a lot to see that somethings wrong.” </p><p>Remus stared at her, considering not saying anything. Then he sighed. </p><p>“I came out to Sirius last night.” </p><p>Lily drew back and sucked in a breath, pulling herself into a seated position. </p><p>“Shit. How’d he take it? Well, I hope. Otherwise he’d be one hell of a hypocrite.” </p><p>Remus snickered. “He took it fine, just a bit shocked I guess.” </p><p>Lily snorted. “I don’t see how. You haven’t exactly been inconspicuous about it.” </p><p>Remus’ eyes narrowed, he snapped the book shut and whacked her with it. Lily scooter further back, raising her arms in mock surrender. </p><p>“What! It’s true! The only person who can’t tell that you’re into Sirius Black, is Sirius Black.” </p><p>“I should hope not,” Remus grumbled. “Might complicate a few things if he did.” </p><p>Lily let out a long suffering sigh. They’d had this conversation before and she knew exactly how it would end; with Remus denying that Sirius would ever like him. She loved him to death but sometimes he really was dumber than a rock. </p><p> </p><p>“Well you’ll never know unless you ask.” </p><p>Remus laughed, dry and sarcastic. “And when was the last time you asked someone out Lily?” </p><p>Lily scowled at him. “Rude.”</p><p>“I’m not wrong, though,” Remus said with a shrug. He looked over at Lily, her arms were folded across her chest, scowl still present.</p><p>Remus sighed. “Look, even if there was a chance— and I’m not saying that there is — that we could end up together I don’t want to mess with our friendship.” Remus ran a hand through his hair, eyes dropping to his lap.</p><p> “I can’t be the one to fuck up our friend group, Lily. I just can’t,” he said softly. </p><p> </p><p>He looked back up at Lily, her features had softened and her green eyes were crinkled slightly at the corners. Lily reached out and grabbed Remus’ hand, squeezing it slightly and smiling at him. </p><p>“I know and you won’t. No matter what happens between you guys, you’ll always still have each other. I might not be fond of your idiot friends but I do know that deep down— very deep down, they’re good people. Loyalty is everything to those morons, they wouldn’t trade your guy’s friendship for the world.” </p><p>“Thanks, Lily.” </p><p>“Of course.” </p><p>A soft breeze floated through the air, making strands of Lily’s hair fly around her face. Next to her a small patch of dandelion seeds floated off into the wind. Lily picked one, handing it over to Remus who looked at her in confusion. </p><p>“Yeah, no. I’m allergic to those things,” Remus said. </p><p>Lily groaned and shoved the flower into Remus’ lap anyways. </p><p>“Blow on it. They’re supposed to grant wishes.” </p><p>Remus laughed. “That’s the biggest load of garbage I’ve ever heard.” </p><p>Lily shrugged, she didn’t particularly care. Picking another dandelion for herself she said, “Can’t hurt time try can it?” She blew on the fluffy seeds, the two of them watching them scatter into the wind. Remus watched them for a second before picking up his own. </p><p>“No, I guess not,” and he sent the seeds scattering into the wind. </p><p>**********</p><p> </p><p>James stared intently down at the chess board in front of him, his hand hovering above the pieces. He needed to make a move. He could of course move the Knight to E5. Then he would be able to take Sirius’ bishop. But if he did that then his bishop could be taken by a pawn in a couple of moves. </p><p>James sighed, he didn’t really have very many options. “Knight E5,” he said finally. Resolving to make up for the inevitable loss of his by taking Sirius’ rook. The Knight moved across the board of its own accord, settling on one of the white squares on the far left. </p><p>James stole a glance at Sirius, expecting to see him silently plotting his demise. Instead, Sirius wasn’t even looking at the chess board, he wasn’t looking anywhere near the table, actually. </p><p>He was staring blankly out of one of the common room windows, twirling his wand back and forth across his fingers. </p><p>“Sirius.” </p><p>Sirius looked up, he seemed mildly startled by his surroundings. “Hmm?”</p><p>James raised an eyebrow at him. “It’s your turn.” </p><p>“Oh. Right.” Sirius leaned over the board, eyes scanning the game, his mind was elsewhere, though. </p><p>James groaned, and moved the game off the table. Sirius blinked in surprise. </p><p>“Just tell me what’s the matter with you, already,” James said. “You’re making the whole game boring.”</p><p>Sirius sat back in his chair. “Nothings wrong, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” </p><p>“Bullshit,” James said irritably. “You’ve been off since you and Remus came back to the dorm last night— yes I saw you come back in,” He rolled his eyes at the shocked look on Sirius’ face. Then, something snapped into place. </p><p>“It’s Remus, isn’t it?” James asked slowly. “He told you he’s bi?” </p><p>If Sirius was shocked a second ago, he was absolutely floored now. “How on earth did you know that.” </p><p>James shrugged. “It wasn’t exactly hard to figure out, Remus wasn’t exactly inconspicuous about it. And you have absolutely no subtlety whatsoever. The real question is how did you not know?”</p><p>Sirius wasn’t sure if he should be impressed by how quickly James figured it out or offended by the comment about his lack of subtlety. He decided that both worked. </p><p>“Well maybe it just isn’t as obvious to you as it is to everyone else.” </p><p>“Oh it is,” James said, shaking his head. “Trust me.” </p><p>Sirius sighed, looping a strand of his hair around his index finger. “He started going on about some guy he’s liked for a while. The man sounds like a bloody moron, apparently he doesn’t like Remus back.” </p><p>James laughed loudly, reclining back in his chair. “Merlin, you really are a moron.” </p><p>Sirius glared at his best friend, who was still chuckling. “Am I missing something.” </p><p>“Yes,” James said, choking on the last of his laughter. “You really are.” </p><p>“Care to elaborate?”</p><p>James shook his head. “Nah, it’d be better if you figure it out on your own. Besides, Wormy and I have a bet and I’m not willing to risk 20 galleons to enlighten you.” </p><p>Sirius threw one of the cushions on the chair at James. “Arse.” </p><p>James caught it with ease and dropped it onto the floor. “You’ll thank me later.” </p><p>Sirius rolled his eyes at him, whatever it was he was pretty sure he wouldn’t thank him later for it. More than likely it was another prank, although why he didn’t know about it was a bit confusing. </p><p>A light breeze floated through the window, causing James to shiver. </p><p>“Close the window, would you,” he asked. </p><p>“Why don’t you close it yourself,” Sirius asked, already on his way to do just that. </p><p>He wrapped his fingers around the handle, prepared to close it when a flash of red caught his eye. From the common room he could see Lily and Remus sitting in the grass. Sirius watched as Lily shoved Remus, who was laughing at something she’d said. She was picking up fistfuls of grass and launching them at Remus and he used a book to shield himself. </p><p>“What’s taking you so long?” James asked, joining Sirius at the window. He followed Sirius’ gaze and laughed a bit. </p><p>Another gust of wind blew through the air, dropping a small fluffy seed into Sirius’ hair. James gently picked it out. </p><p>“What is it?” Sirius looked curiously at the small seed pinched between James’ fingers. </p><p>“A dandelion seed. Make a wish.” </p><p>Sirius gave him a funny look. “Why?”</p><p>James shrugged. “I dunno, someone once told me that dandelions grant wishes.” </p><p>“It was Lily, wasn’t it?” </p><p>James shrugged, again. “Does ur really matter? Besides, what’ve you got to lose?” </p><p>Sirius extended his hand and James dropped the seed into his palm. </p><p>“Nothing,” Sirius said, staring at the seed. “Absolutely nothing.” </p><p>Then he closed his eyes and cast the seed off into the wind.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Personally I think this came out a bit iffy but hope other people liked it!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The one where they finally get together</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The party was stifling, filled to the brim with chattering people and loud music. Everyone drunk on firelight and laughter. It was long past midnight and the party was in full swing. They were celebrating that afternoons Quidditch win. They’d beat Ravenclaw 210 to 30. </p><p>Sirius had always been one for parties. He lived off of the carefree joy and cheap thrills they provided. Tonight was no exception. His arm was slung around James’ shoulders, one hand reaching up to ruffle his already impossibly messy hair, while with the other clutched a bottle. He couldn’t remember what kind of alcohol was in it. Scotch? Whiskey? Fire Whiskey? Who knows, he’d grabbed the first thing he’d seen off the table and popped it open. </p><p>Besides, that was the least of his concerns. Currently he was more worried about being heard over all the noise. </p><p>“I can’t believe we actually won!” Sirius shouted in James’ ear. </p><p>“Did you really doubt my abilities as a Chaser?” James asked, cocky as ever. </p><p>Sirius paused for a moment, tilting his head back and squinting at the ceiling. “Ummmmm…”</p><p>James shoved him off. “Oh fuck off, you. You knew full well that we’d win. Their seeker was out and we all know the backup is shit.” </p><p>Sirius chuckled, amused by his friend's indignation. “Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t.” </p><p>“You wouldn’t have agreed to be commentator if you thought we’d lose.” </p><p>“Nah, mate, I still would’ve. I’d never pass up the chance to watch you make a fool of yourself in front of Evans. Oh...wait, that’s everyday!”</p><p>James scowled at him and flipped him two fingers, which in turn made Sirius laugh harder. </p><p>“It was a group effort, remember?” Sirius said, chasing after James who was doing his best to get away from him. “I couldn’t have done it without Marlene.” </p><p>“Without Marlene?” A flutter of red and gold fabric drifted by his eyes and wrapped around his waist. </p><p>Sirius spun around, grin widening when he saw Marlene. She was dressed from head to toe in Gryffindor colors, blond hair pulled back into a high ponytail. Several banners had magically wrapped themselves around her, looping over her shoulders and trailing behind her. </p><p>Sirius raised an eyebrow. “Classy.”</p><p>“Wearable.” Marlene corrected. “I heard my name?”</p><p>Sirius nodded. “I was just chatting with James over here— where’d he go?” Sirius looked around him. At some point between Marlene’s arrival and the present moment James had disappeared. </p><p>“Huh, guess he skipped out on me. Anyways, we were just talking about how we’d have stayed commentators even if we thought our team would lose. Purely for the purpose of making fun of James.” </p><p>Marlene snorted. “Never did take criticism well, did he?” </p><p>“Nope, never.” </p><p>The pair grinned at each other, shared memories of their friends passing between them. </p><p>Finally Marlene said, “It’s been quite a night hasn’t it? I lost track of Lily and Dorcas ages ago. Quite honestly I’m surprised McGonagall hasn’t shut us down yet, think she knows?” </p><p> </p><p>Sirius nodded fervently, mind a bit distracted as he said, “Oh she definitely knows. Minnie has a sort of sixth sense for when parties occur. I figure it’ll be another hour or two before she comes up here. Say, have you happened to see Remus or Peter?” </p><p>He’d seen some of his friends throughout the night, but since Marlene mentioned it he couldn’t recall having seen them for a while. Sirius scanned the room, eyes falling over kissing couples and every manner of dancing. No sign of his friends. </p><p>Marlene shook her head. “Not for a while. Last I saw of Peter he was by the snacks and Remus was with Lily.” </p><p>Sirius nodded, still searching. “Right...what direction was Lily in again?” </p><p>“I dunno, you’d have to look for her.” Marlene tugged lightly at Sirius’ wrist. “Come on, come dance with me.” </p><p>As fun as that sounded, Sirius found that he was struck with the sudden urge to know where his friends were. Specially Remus. </p><p>“I think I should find Remus first. Although, I’m sure your girlfriend would love to.” </p><p>“Fuck off, Sirius.” Marlene said, with a glare. “I’m not dating Dorcas.” </p><p>“Mind as well be.” </p><p>Marlene snatches the bottle out of Sirius’ hand. “What’s in this?” </p><p>“Not a clue.” </p><p>“Of course not. I’d say your best bet to finding Remus would be Lily. She’s pretty good at keeping tabs on people.” </p><p>Sirius nodded, starting to move away from Marlene. “Thanks.” </p><p>“Not a problem. You owe me 20 galleons by the way,” she called after him. </p><p>“What on earth for?” </p><p>“A bet.”</p><p>“Which one?” </p><p>Marlene laughed, throwing him a wink over her shoulder and raising the bottle. “You’ll figure it out. Cheers.” </p><p>Then she disappeared into the crowd. Sirius shook his head, shouldering through people in search of Lily. </p><p>He finally found her sitting in one of the chairs near the fire. “Have you seen Remus,” Sirius asked, leaning over the head of the chair. </p><p>Lily twisted around in her seat and sent him a reproachful look. “Were you trying to sneak up on me?”</p><p>“Sorry.” </p><p>Lily’s glare didn’t fade, but she pointed towards the portrait hole. “He said something about fresh air. Party was getting a bit much for him.” </p><p>Sirius looked towards the portrait hole, he had an idea as to wear Remus had gone. </p><p>“Thanks Lily.” </p><p>“No problem. Now leave me alone and try not to scare anymore unsuspecting women, Black.” </p><p>Sirius walked around the chair, stepping over bits of broken glass. “Will do, Evans.” </p><p>*******</p><p>Remus was in the Astronomy tower. The cold air and starlight a nice break from the chaos of Gryffindor tower. He hasn’t expected to be out there for that long, but he’d gotten lost in scenery and the smell of pine trees and magic.</p><p>That was the first thing he’d noticed when he first came to Hogwarts, how it smelled. The scent of trees mingled with the pleasant burn of magic. All perfectly in sync with the mysterious air the ancient castle and its surrounding forest gave off.</p><p>The air up in the tower was somehow crisper. Different from the dusky smoke and polished wood smell of Gryffindor’s tower. From up here he could see almost all of the grounds. Slightly eerie in their silence, the forest a dark warning against the starlit sky. </p><p>He could also had a spectacular view of the moon from here, or at least what he was able to see of it every month. His relationship with the moon was a curious one, marred by contempt for the pain it caused him, and yet filled with an insatiable need to be closer to it. It truly was odd how much people wanted what they couldn’t have. </p><p>So many stories were told in its light. Moon-drunk kisses on dark piers and secrets exchanged under the cover of silent alleys, only the moon to guide them under a starless sky. </p><p>Remus remembered standing on the railing one night. Everyone in the dorm had been asleep except Remus. The full had been coming up and with it came a lack of sleep. He’d come up here to stare at the moon, his own silent war. He’d never intended to climb on the rail, his arm wrapped around a pillar so that he didn’t slip. It was an odd response to curiosity, putting yourself on the brink of death. He remembered briefly wondering what would happen if he fell. Would the moon catch him? Finally giving back to him a life it had spent so long taking? </p><p>Even now he wondered about it sometimes. Staring upwards as he leaned against the rail, resting his body’s weight on his arms. </p><p>Remus head the footsteps before the person even got up the stairs. Soft and light from years of sneaking out in the dead of night. Sirius. </p><p>Remus turned and sure enough, there he was. Sirius Black. Almost ethereal in the halo of the moonlight. Wrapped in his trademark leather jacket, strands of midnight black hair whipping around his face. </p><p>“Thought I’d find you up here,” Sirius said, joining him at the rail. </p><p>“You thought correctly.” Remus winced internally, he wasn’t sure how more standoffish he could get. </p><p>“Lily told me you wanted to get away from the crowd,” Sirius started turning to look at him. </p><p>“She’s not wrong,” Remus said. Apparently he could get much more standoffish. </p><p>“Do you want me to leave?” Sirius asked, he tucked a few strands of his hair behind his ear. Glaring at it as he did. </p><p>Remus shook his head. “No. No, stay.” </p><p>Sirius nodded. “Ok.” </p><p>Remus watched him for a moment. This boy that he’d been in love with for longer than he could remember or cared to admit. He couldn’t imagine a world without Sirius Black. He couldn’t imagine his world without Sirius Black. Remus remembered what Lily had said about him never being able to drive his friends away.</p><p>“I know and you won’t. No matter what happens between you guys, you’ll always still have each other. I might not be fond of your idiot friends but I do know that deep down— very deep down, they’re good people. Loyalty is everything to those morons, they wouldn’t trade your guy’s friendship for the world.”</p><p>But I’m still scared, Remus thought. Scared of losing everything and everyone leaving. Scared of being left behind. </p><p>Then he remembered the dandelion. That small seed carrying a dream away on the wind. Remus knew that the first step towards making a wish come true, was doing something to help it along. Staying silent wouldn’t do anything, it never did. And Lily was rarely wrong about people, she might not be wrong about Sirius. </p><p>Remus took a deep breath, mentally kicking himself as he turned to Sirius. “I made a wish the other day.” </p><p>Sirius looked up. “A wish?”</p><p>“Yeah, Lily was reminding me of this muggle superstition that dandelions grant wishes.” </p><p>Sirius grinned at him, grey eyes crinkling in amusement. “Oh yeah? And what did you wish for?”</p><p>“For the person I like to like me back,” Remus replied, slowly. He was honestly surprised that his voice was still working. </p><p>Instantly the amusement dropped from Sirius’ face. It was replaced by a passive, slightly melancholy look. If Remus didn’t know any better he’d think he looked...disappointed?</p><p>“Well, did it come true?” Sirius had turned away from Remus, he wasn’t sure if he really wanted the answer to that question. </p><p>“I don’t know, you tell me.”</p><p>The few moments that followed had to be some of the longest of Remus’ life. Sirius had turned back towards him, those grey eyes flickering with a thousand emotions. Remus was seriously beginning to reconsider not throwing himself off the tower when he’d had the chance. </p><p>“What,” Sirius breathed. </p><p>“I..er—“</p><p>“Did you just...ask me out?” Sirius asked, his voice barely a whisper. </p><p>“Yes?” Remus said, more question than answer. </p><p>For a second they just stared at each other, unmoving. Then, Sirius pulled Remus forward, tugging his head down and pressing their lips together. </p><p>And all of a sudden Remus understood why people liked the moon. How it could seem so beautiful in moments like these. </p><p>Finally they broke apart, Sirius’ arms still wrapped Remus’ shoulders. </p><p>“That was…unexpected,” Remus mumbled.</p><p>Sirius laughed lightly, “Sorry...I just never expected you to…” be trialed off. </p><p>“How long?” Remus asked. “How long have you—“</p><p>“Years,” Sirius finished. “Since third, at least.”</p><p>“I— yeah, me too.”</p><p>Suddenly Sirius broke off into laughter, leaning against a pillar to keep from falling down. </p><p>“What?” Remus asked, mildly alarmed. </p><p>“Nothing—nothing it’s just something that James said. I finally understand what he was laughing at me about.” </p><p>Remus was beyond confused but he decided not to ask. </p><p>Instead he asked, “so what now?” </p><p>Sirius stopped laughing and grinned at him. It was a look of pure adoration. Pure adoration and love. He looked beautiful, absolutely beautiful, Remus thought. </p><p>“Now, I think your wish gets granted,” Sirius said, and then he pulled him back into another kiss. A million thoughts were racing through Remus mind, but the most prominent one was: I guess sometimes, wishes do come true.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>And that concludes this oneshot turned mini series!</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Follow me on tumblr @e-of-west-glendia</p></blockquote></div></div>
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